when to end the husband search

ok so i got a request about a post on husband hunting... because the issue is rather large i will do it post by post.

Now i am no expert on hunting husbands.. but i am married.. and i have friends who are married or looking for a man... so all this is from experience.. so dont take it to heart as what the muslim man is all about.. these are just examples in my circle..

ok here we go

When a guy proposes to you or starts talking to you about marriage, the smart girls try to find out as much as possible about their possible groom. sometimes you find out something that you really dont like in the person and when this happens you have to weigh up whether or not it is a deal breaker..

here are a few deal breakers that either I or my friends have personally experienced -

When to say NO to a man:::

• when the first time you talk to him on the phone he asks you to wear pantyhose when you physically first meet and goes on to describe his pantyhose fetish
• when he tells you he owns a crackpipe or a bong... or both
• when he tells you that you are the only one, when you know for a fact that he had sex with a random asian chick, whom he met 10 minutes earlier, in his car in the local car park
• when he tells you he cant speak to you right now because he is in the car with his sister.. and by sister he means his naked ex-girlfriend.. and by car.. well yeah at least he was honest about the car
• when he says he is serious about marrying you but starts trying to chat up your non-muslim friend... the girl he doesnt know is actually your best friend
• when he tells you he is sick and cant come to the islamic lecture with you.. so instead you hang out and go to the late night movie with your friends and when you leave you see him through the window of an upstairs nightclub.. surrounded by girls
• when you go through his computer and you find about 45 files of pornographic material.. some videos and some pics sent to him from girls on his MSN list.. talk about private show
• when he tells you he only "casually drinks"
• when he says swears he tries to please Allah all the time and stays away from Haram and then later he calls you, drunk, and spills his guts out about that one time back in Dubai when he had sex with a tranny.. and then goes on to tell you he lost his virginity to a 17 year old prostitute in London.. and THEN goes on to tell you that he regularly visits Thailand to see the sex shows (including ones involving ping pong balls) and have private meetings with the street workers..and THEN confesses his undying love for you and still expects you to marry him
• when he calls himself a devout muslim but only attends the mosque on either Lailat Al Qadr or for the whole of Ramadan
• when he says he would rather stay home and get drunk by himself than come with you to the masjid to pray taraweeh in ramadan.. no matter how hard you beg him
• when he tells you he would rather that you would take off your hijab because you look hotter without it
• when you ask him "why do you want to marry me?" and his first reply is "because you're beautiful"... NOT. GOOD. ENOUGH.
• when he swears to you that he is a virgin when you know he slept with your friend a few years beforehand
• when he utters ANY lie to you.. no matter how small
• when you find out from a restaurant worker (who is actually your cousin) that he was in the restaurant last night with his friends, drunk, asking if the meat was Halal (we laughed so hard about this hypocrisy)
• when he says "forever and ever" when what he realy means is "until my study ends and i have to go back to Saudi Arabia"
• when his eyes dart to every single woman he comes across and you always catch him checking out other girls
• when he pretends to be something he is not
• when he doesnt really understand Islam but expects you to completely bow down to him and treat him like a God because thats his culture
• when he talks to you about marriage.. and does the same to Fatima, Heba, Samira, Jamila around the corner and Yasmeena back in Lebanon
• when his facebook account had 28 different girls on it and he leaves messages like "you look so sexy.. i wish i was there with you" on their pictures
  

ahhhhhh... there are so many more...

so there you go.. a short list of reasons when to say "No" to a guy about marriage.. what are some your shocking stories of "No"?